Saturday, July 14, 2012

The Temple of Love

Lately, I didn't write much on my blog, because I realised that many posts I have written are hardly being read. I don't see the point anymore after spending so much effort on my blog. And actually, I believe I have wrote all what I have to say already. There is not much to add anymore.

As you all might have expected, I still visit prostitutes. I visit prostitutes while acting like a chicken without a head. Young or old, beautiful or ugly, free or forced. It doesn't really matter to me. I ignore my own tips to clients to avoid young window prostitutes and Eastern European prostitutes, because these groups are known to be often coerced or exploited.

While hopping from brothel to brothel, and never really having a satisfied experience, I finally stumbled upon a place which I could best describe as: the Temple of Love. What I have experienced with a prostitute there, I have never experienced before. I was completely pampered. The prostitute immediately started to French kiss me. It was a wonderful experience, it was as if we really made love. Not just the fixation on sexual intercourse, like with other prostitutes. What's more, I believe she is the most beautiful woman I have ever met in my life (and she had an equally beautiful ass ;-). Okay her breasts were fake). I visited the same brothel again and had sex with another prostitute who worked there. She gave me the same treatment. And she was equally beautiful (and she had an equally beautiful ass too, which she gave me the privilege to kiss!). And she was very friendly too!! We chatted a little about cats being dropped off somewhere miles away, and still finding their way back home. I theorised this could be because they can smell the outside environment from inside the car, and then find their way back because they remembered the scent trail. Or perhaps they use sonar. She theorised that it could be because they use GPS.

So I believe I have found heaven on earth. I believe I don't want to visit any other brothel in my life. From now on, I don't fight my own sexuality or my visits to prostitutes anymore. I will become a regular now. And the lucky thing is that I rarely hear about forced prostitution in this particular type of brothel that I visited, a type of brothel which is often referred to as a "privéhuis". And all the women who work in this particular brothel are Dutch nationals. You don't often hear about Dutch prostitutes being forced in sex clubs or “privéhuizen”. (For those who are curious, I talk about Huize Monique on the Dirk Loogenstraat 3 in Amersfoort. This is not a commercial.)

The thing is, that the night after I visited the latter prostitute I regularly woke up with the awful feeling that I have abused a person.

Perhaps this will be a final goodbye (although I have a plan to write about a particular forced prostitution case).

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

so you forgot to tell us two important things: where exactly is it and how much do they charge? ;)

Cliente X said...

Hey, don't get down. I read you, really. I want to answer ur post about Dina Siegel and her findings about eastern pros but I have been very busy.

It's true that usually ppl don't want a blog like urs or mine, about serious aspects of prostitution. But come on, u'll always find some reader that will appreciate ur work. I do.

Thanks for all, monkey. I promise to comment more as sonn as I can.

Anonymous said...

I am sad to read you are considering no longer writing this blog, I have been reading it regularly for a long time.

I am disappointed to hear that the blog is not widely read. You put a lot into it and go to great effort, particularly in finding and translating documents, and your work writing this blog has been greatly appreciated by me over several years.

Though I have rarely left a comment, you included two comments I posted in your blog in 2010 under the title ‘Column’ and ‘Column 2’.

Your blog is valuable and I believe you should continue to write it.
In your blog you write in a serious way, dealing with issues which though unfashionable, are nonetheless highly important. You write with balance and compassion and though I do not always agree with you, you reach your conclusions with the best intentions and do not censor your results. This is rare. Most information available about prostitution in academic study or in blogs is written by activists and is tailored to their pre-judged point of view. That you do not do this, but reflect the uncertainty and complexity of the realities of the industry - even acknowledging that the truth cannot always be found - is reason enough for it to be important for you to continue.
Spending many hours writing an article then receiving no feedback cannot be an easy thing and must be very discouraging. It is not surprising that you sometimes wonder whether the effort was worthwhile and feel like you are 'shouting into the void.' You are not: we do read what you write, and think about it too, though it may not always feel that way.

Why do I often not leave a comment? – Two reasons: You deal with complex issues in a serious and detailed way, so any reply needs to be considered or it will not add anything.
Secondly, I do not always feel I have much to add beyond whether I agree with you or not. I often cannot back up my viewpoint with experience or reading. Maybe I should have commented more often.

Donkey said...

Thank you for all the sweet answers, Cliente X and second anonymous. The thing is that I get approximately 150 page views a day. One person told me that this actually is not bad at all. I know that some prostitutes with blogs (like zondares.blogspot.com , maggiemcneill.wordpress.com, and Jeanette1.punt.nl), receive some 3000 page views a day. That's 20 times more than I get. That puts things into perspective. Until recently I couldn't really see how often individual posts on my blog were viewed. Blogger didn't have that option. Now it has. It was shocking to see that several posts had only about 30 page views after several months. I was completely flabbergasted. And probably only a couple of people actually read such posts. I lost a lot of my motivation. Actually, it's not the number of comments that bothers me. Cliente X, how many page views do you have?

Thank you for the positive feedback, second anonymous. It really makes me feel that my efforts have been somewhat worthwhile. I actually feel a bit embarrassed. What do you think about me? A person who first advises not to visit young window prostitutes, then comes with horror stories to back up his claim, and then visits young Eastern European window prostitutes himself?

To answer the first commenter: I think you are joking, but I actually explicitly name the brothel in my post, including its address, so read carefully again (actually it is: Huize Monique, Dirk Loogenstraat 3, Amersfoort, www.huize-monique.com). The brothel has its own website by the way. You pay 70 Euro for half an hour, 50 Euro for a quarter of an hour, and 100 Euro for an hour. This is very affordable. I only hope that the women are treated with respect by the brothel operators, a man and a woman. That's my only fear, that the prostitutes are not treated with respect, that they are somehow forced or pushed by the brothel operators to do all these lovely things with the clients.

Cliente X said...

I have not a lot of time now, really I want to answer u about that issue of the forced prostitutes and the work of the sociologist José López Riopedre (University of Lugo) and antropologist Jose Luis Solana Ruiz (University of Jaén). They had done a really intense and hard work comparable to the done by Dina Siegel.

My blog usually has around 200 visits daily, altough some time ago it had 400 and sometimes reaches thousands of visits (specially if its linked in webs like menéame).

And keep ur good work, the important is that u have really loyal followers.

Zondares said...

I don't get so many more pageviews. The most pageviews are from people filling in my polls and then coming back to the page, or they go through the pages of my archive, and that counts up. I get only 300 "unique visitors" every day.

You dont get so much stupid and insulting things as me, so be happy!

Huize Monique is not a bad place to work, the people are very respectfull. I know people who have worked there. It is a prima place, but it is no place to go if you are possible to work for yourself. That is much better always.

Anonymous said...

I don’t think badly of you – on the contrary, you seem a decent, empathetic man who cares about the fate of others in your writing. You seem to be rather self destructive though, sometimes acting compulsively then being unreasonably critical of yourself afterwards.

I don’t think buying or selling sex is in any way wrong, provided it is conducted without exploitation, manipulation or intimidation of the woman working there and they are treated with decency and respect. If you can find such a place then there’s no reason to feel guilt from visiting.

Donkey said...

Zondares, it is good to hear that Huize Monique is really a respectful place for prostitutes.

Anonymous, thank you for being so kind. It is only so difficult however to find such a respectful place. I hope I have found it.

Anonymous said...

The "temple of love" reads like there needs to be a book written about your experience.
I too believe that you should continue to write your experiences on this blog because its a cool thing to do.
I too had an amazing experience in amsterdam but it never occurred to me I should write about it.
That is the difference between you and me... Keep at it my friend!

Anonymous said...

My three closest friends and I went to Amsterdam this spring and on one night we all went out and had sex with window prostitutes.

My own experience wasn't so great. She was one of the ones that only offered the bare minimum (oral+missionary, and no breast touching) so I had to pay 30 Euros more for a total of 80 for her to have sex on top of me and to feel her breasts. And this was negotiated *outside* the door... I can only imagine what the price would have been had I went inside first.

The whole experience lasted less than ten minutes and was very underwhelming. It was basically "oral for 2-3 minutes" followed by "grind the hell out of me so I'll cum as fast as possible". She didn't speak much and clearly just wanted me out of there quickly. Two of my other friends had somewhat similar experiences with being charged extra and cold, mechanical sex. The other one was lucky and only paid 50 and yet got multiple positions and had a great time.

We might go back next year. Maybe. But reading this blog has given me a lot to think about. Guys don't think much about the women they're paying to have sex with... they just want to thrust their dicks in and out, sweat, grunt, fondle breasts, and orgasm... just a quick fuck with no attachments, followed by moving on. It's shameful, really. At least with casual sex you know the other isn't *forced* to have sex with you. The prostitute I was with was a Eastern European, slim, busty blonde who may well be coerced into prostitution, but I'll never know for sure.

I do feel like shit. That was the first time I had sex with a prostitute but it probably won't be the last. Also, on a related note those "Red Light Sex Trips" videos are complete and utter bullshit... I went to Amsterdam thinking my experience would be like that but it clearly wasn't at all.