A while a ago I decided to stop following prostitution news. I couldn't, and I still followed several twitter-accounts about prostitution. I decided to stop doing this too. I don't look at twitter anymore.
Accidentally I stumbled on an article about a happy prostitute who worked on de Wallen in Amsterdam and on het Zandpad in Utrecht (and which unfortunately triggered me to visit a prostitute again), and I desperately wanted to write something about her. And I thought, no... I won't. Let's just stop it. (For those who are curious, you can find the article on blendle.nl. The article was originally published in the Viva on 30 September 2014, and it is called Vrijwillig achter het raam - IK ACTEER ALLES: HET KREUNEN, HOE IK ERBIJ KIJK EN HET ORGASME).
Lately I discovered that Google Play Books offered at lot of books, including about prostitution! I can now read some books about prostitution online. I can now read Ronald Weitzer's Legalizing Prostitution: From Illicit Vice to Lawful Business. I don't have to order an actual physical copy anymore which would fill up unnecessary physical space. I decided not to do it.
As for my sexual problems, I can't get my sexuality under control, and I although I call myself an abolitionist now, there still are thoughts within me which say prostitution is acceptable. I think I will have to struggle with this for the rest of my life.
Perhaps when I'm old I automatically become impotent. I know that what has happened to my grandpa, so there is still hope.
So now, for real and with no exceptions and slight returns....
And I wish all the prostitutes in the world all the luck and love in the world.